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About Me

My photo

 My story may shock you, but then again your situation may be worse. Delve in and find out....
The best moments are the ones when, that affect people positively and inspire them to laugh and live. 
             But is this, the entire story?
 The Human experience is Unique and every person has something to give, you just need to see it from my perspective and I craft words, actions and events from this very human angle.

Ade's Journal Part 6

Ade's Journal Part 6
My Valentine & The Elegance Of A Clean Breakup

Ade's Journal Part 5

Ade's Journal Part 5
My Scrumptious Valentine Kiss

Ade's Journal Part 4

Ade's Journal Part 4
A Scorpion is not a Lobster

Ade's Journal Part 3

Ade's Journal Part 3
My Insane Week Before Valentine

Ade's Journal Part 2

Ade's Journal Part 2
He Had The Guts To Come Back

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Tuesday, 10 May 2016

Your Love Bounced Back Like A Frisbee


"ADE'S JOURNAL" 30

    Have you ever fallen and yet never hit rock bottom? Let go of all your body, and just relaxed. To be awakened from such a dream is like been given a second chance at life. You look around and feel relief to be somewhere familiar. To be free. I always wanted a partner that makes me smile effortlessy. And Like a miracle you wanted to free me. Only Your love bounced back like Frisbee, ricocheting and causing fractures. Making me ignore your many failures. I taste it all in your sweetened bile. Held tight by my loving crocodile, spinning me your favourite prey in an endless death roll. As I hold on and pray, my smile now bloated and pale.
    Oh, how I wish I was weak. Then my stupidity would make sense. For all my strength, my dear is past tense. Jumbled up as I begin to question everything. My tiara is no longer my crown, it sits on a tarp covering all I thought I had.
      My mind is heavy and I try not to over analyze everything. Saddened by my attraction to this man I promised meant nothing  to me.
    You won't believe who just walked in? I didn't even notice till she dropped her car keys in front of me.
    I was too busy enjoying Daniels university day tales. I had mine too but he was so naughty and was practically daring the vice Chancellor to rusticate him.
'So you want to say, you did not see me eh?'
I look up and it is Ashabi.
    She had on the tightest boob tube gown I had ever seen and her bleach blond hair on her very dark skin made her stand out.
'Hi...'
     The man with her had a large protruding stomach and complete full white hair. He looks like he is eighty years old. I judged him on all levels and realized my mouth was still open.
'Hi', I say and try to calculate the age gap in my mind.
'Yes, he is a fine aged wine but we are in love'. Ashabi was always annoyingly blunt.
If she was not calling him uncle, she better not call me Aunty Ade.
''Ade, why haven't we seen you?'
  I thought Aunty Ade would be bad, but Ade was worse.
'Seen you, how?'
    I was stern and Daniel clears his throat, his own not so subtle way of trying to calm me down. Yes, I know I raised my voice but it was Ashabi. She always knows how to vex somebody, as if i am her age mate.

Nonsense and ingredients.

   I have a good mind to knock some sense into her tiny head.
'Please, introduce me to the cute couple...', Daniel says to me and I open my mouth.
 
   Ashabi laughs hard and long and touches his shoulders. I inhale hard and long and remind myself I am still been accessed. My first impression would linger on forever oooo. So I plaster on a fake smile, realize it won't work. So I laugh at the situation and my smile softens and feels more believable.
'Meet Ashabi, my friends younger sister. I don't know who...'
    I wave my hand at her friend.
'He is Chukwudi, he is a rich merchant and single. His children refuse to come back home, so...'
Daniel cuts in, '....you will provide him children that will stay?'
Ashabi laughs again and turns to Daniel.
'I am Daniel Ojora'
'He is cute, does Mr. H know you two are....'
   She points at two of us and giggles, implying I am doing some kind of hanky panky with my date.
'Oh it's purely business, I know she is engaged to Harrison'
Daniel tries to reassure my annoying friends sister.
'Yet...'
Ashabi sighs and picks up her car keys.
'.... I see no engagement ring, have you seen mine?'
   She flashes the largest diamond I have ever seen in my face. I was still staring at it, I have never seen a diamond that massive in my entire life, bi ko nu.
'Anyway, don't let Ajoke say I am the reason you stopped coming to our house oooo'
She does not even wait for a reply, she walks away and drags her man with her.
    I bury my head in my hand and shake it.
'She isn't under aged, right?'
'Eighteen this month, I think'
'You think he's eighty, yet?'
'Haba, that will make him sixty two years older', I protest.
'Or more...  I miss Nigeria, walahi I should have schooled here'
'Please, Americans marry people that old too. After all, age is nothing but a number...'
'True, but all our prim and proper rules?'
'Those that follow, still follow ooo. Others don't care or care too much'
'Your Mr. H is up to thirty years older?'
'Of course not'
'So Egbon is...'
'What's ya own? After all, age is nothing but a number'
'I understand that but...'
     I stand up, no doubt he is easy to talk to, but dinner is over.
'I had a great laugh and it's been long my work has been appreciated'
'Oh you will have enough people appreciating your work'. I reassured him because his pictures were amazing.
'Only your opinions count, hope you like the beach?'
Daniel asks in all his effortless arrogance, I give him a side eye.
'Why?'
'Typical Nigerian babe, answering a question with a question'
'Na you know o'
'You schooled by the beach right?'
'Yep, my university was a fifteen minutes drive. And the lagoon was our border'
'Any birthdays there?'
'All five at Eleko beach'
     Daniel was close now and looking into my eyes and again was too close for comfort. I squat and maneuver my way into my car.
'It was nice meeting you', I wave and drive off. I have to prepare dinner and I look at the time. It's nine thirty.
How time flies when you are having fun. Mr. H calls to say he and Bala have a meeting and I don't mind. Really, I didn't feel like cooking. And this was an opportunity to catch up with Ajoke.

    I heard Celine's voice and Ajoke's laughter and I frown as I walk into Ajoke's home.
'Eh Hehn, it's like that now. You two decide to have fun without me'
'Your P.A. said you were in a meeting with Chief Ojora', Celine says.
'How did it go?'
'Great'
'You are holding back'
'Celine what's ya own?'
'I jammed Ashabi at that new Morrocan restaurant'
'...And you didn't bring take away', Ajoke complains.
'..With a man'
'It's Ashabi, she will die in the arms of a man'
'Don't say that about your sister, she will change. Did Chief toast you?'
'The man is almost eighty, of course not'
'But..'
'His nephew was there, for business ooo'
'The same one that will marry within six months'
'Celine, that Gist is supposed to be coded'
'We will fight oo, since when are you two hiding things from fashionista Ajoke. Iya ibeji....'
'You are having twins?'
'Boy and girl', she seemed with joy.
'God bless you dear'
'Ashabi's date is older than Chief'
   Ajoke laughs.
'She will get bored....'
'Have you seen the ring?'
'What ring? Celine did you see it too?'
'I thought you knew, it's her profile picture on Facebook'
   Ajoke was silent and sucked hard at the Agbalumo fruit in her hand. Then picks up her phone.
'You are not lying shaaa. I swear to God who made me, I will kill her. Is that the man, grand Papa she wants to marry?'
  Celine laughs and I try to hold my laughter.
'The babe shaa wants to out do, her sister. Marry twice your husband to be's age and from  what Google search reports... The man has correct money'
   Ajoke starts to cry and we both hug her.
'If I fight her, I might loose her. And with men killing their wives because they suspect they are sleeping around...'
'One man, Ajoke, it's one man and they have caught him. Thank God. But the other one, used to beat his wife and tie her up. Because she had no source of income, right?'

      I am in as much shock as Ajoke right now. How could Celine throw such a low blow? It's the truth but, no one likes to hear the truth.
   Ajoke wipes the tears and looks at Celine.
'You that you are an international designer nko? One local man that cannot even find a job beat hell out of you and...'
 Celine jumps to her feet and points at Ajoke.
'Please you two let's not fight, abuse, verbal or physical can come from anywhere. Let's not blame the women like everyone is doing already'
   Celine in all her rage, wraps her all natural long hair and tucks it in a bun. And Ajoke turns her Agbalumo fruit inside out and scrapes the flesh with her teeth.
'Thank God we have a support system, willing to not just talk but help physically remove the abused from the lion's den'
   I remind my two friends.
'Oooh hooo', Ajoke grumbles. We all know she pitched in to help Celine escape Mathias.
'Celine has not forgotten and we both know she could afford to leave the abusive relationship but emotionally, on her own she couldn't'
  I sound like the mother in this relationship but sometimes, one of us three, must be mature.
'No vex, I am kind of ashamed my sister refuses to work. It's a sensitive subject'
'..... And I like to pretend, it was not me that her boyfriend was beating up. Every night, every time, I mean... Thank you. It was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life'
 Ajoke holds Celine's hand and I am glad they made up.
''Abeg go wash your hand jare, it's sticky', Celine grumbles.
We all laugh.
'So, on a scale of one to ten. How hot is chief's nephew?'
 Ajoke asked and picked up another Agbalumo fruit and sucked on several seeds at once.
'I am Googling his picture and..  '
Celine stops talking and Ajoke snatches the phone.
  Ajoke opens her mouth.
'Na die Mr. H dey'
 Celine grabs her phone and uses wipes to clean the casing. Then Celine reads and speaks.
'Before now, my cousin had a chance but this Daniel guy really wants to start a family and has promised his mother on mother's dayI am Daniel Ojora' that he will be married before the end of the year'
Ajoke snatches it again.
'Did he mention 'Ade?'
'No, but says his uncle and family approves'

      The silence in the room scared me and then I laugh.
'Mr. H has nothing to worry about'
'He has not given you a ring...'
'... Or officially proposed. Now I am scared'
'Even Ashabi mentioned that in front of Daniel'
'We need to flog her, once she comes home let's all pin her down and beat some sense into her', Ajoke says and used the wipe to angrily remove the sticky flesh from her own hands.
'Do you still love him?'
'Completely...'
'Celine, it's because they are not sleeping together. Their temples are still seperate, uninhabited by either parties'
'Ajoke, don't say that'
'It's Baratu, her business relationship has affected you two'
'That's what I said', Ajoke shrieks. As if it was good news.
'No worries, I too have a business deal with Daniel Ojora..'
'Nnnoooo', they both echo and protest.
'This will either make or break us'.
   In that exact moment Ashabi walks in and looks at us. Ajoke was practically praying she would not greet us, so she could justify attacking her younger sister.
'Good evening to my big sisters'
 Ajoke stands up and Ashabi hugs her and shows her the ring.
'Chukwudi proposed'
 Ajoke was about to speak but stopped and looked at the ring again.
'My God'
'Exactly, who can say no?'
 Celine pinched me a little too hard and I grunt.
'I thought you were with...'
'I was just having fun, this...', she points at the ring.
'.... Is a keeper'
'And when your kids are twenty, he will be hundred...'
'... And five. I don't care, I'm tired of all you women grumbling about missed opportunities. I am going to travel round the world till I am thirty. Then, I will decide what I want'
 Ajoke holds both her hands.
'No matter what, you will still regret it. And you will give mum and dad a heart attack'
'Good, they never cared and you all covered up. I am the child that would forever remind them of how misplaced their priorities were'
'So, this is revenge?'
'Nope, this is fun. Our wedding is next year. And of course Celine is our designer and P.R. goes to Ade'
 Ashabi struts away, her phone rings.
'Sweety, I've told Ajoke. She doesn't mind'
And she disappears into a room.
'Are you alright?', I had to ask.
'I don't know', Ajoke says and curls into the couch. I think she is in shock, the man is eighty five years old.
  Ajoke dozed off and Celine and I pick up the Agbalumo fruit skins and put them in a bin.
'What else can she do?'
'It's best they don't fight ooo'
'I agree'
'So, are you and Mr. H going to have the talk?'
'No'
'Then I will talk to him....'
'What is your problem?'
'You say you love him, yet you won't talk to him'
'He obviously does not want to get married...'
'But you said, he said he would have but Frank's...'
'Frank's, Daniel's, every potential competition is an excuse. You made a blood convenant with your ex, you had a physical and spiritual separation... Did it stop your French bobo from proposing?'
  Celine did not expect this line of questioning and says nothing.
'Oh hooo'
'They are continents apart and the two situations are completely different...'
'See eh, I have never been a do or die babe. I want respect and love and I have it but I also want commitment'
'I know, just talk to him'
'I will', and then I yawn.
'Aren't we too young to be tired at past ten?'
'It's Ajoke's fault. The babe will drink if she follows us...'
'But she's asleep', I point at Ajoke. Her house keeper comes around and we signal to her.
''Abeg, we will come back. Tell your madam we went to grab something from my house..'
'I want to join you ooo', Ashabi shouts.
'Sssshhh', we both shut her down.
The babe had her six inch shoes and changed to bum shorts and a tank top, in front of us.
'Are you two going like that?', her condescending tone put me off.
'We both have on camisoles and smart pants, we will leave our blazers in the car'

  I took an ice cold sip of Bailey's Irish cream and just shut my eyes. It was like swimming in cream. Celine and Ashabi were watching me and as I open my eyes, I laugh.
We dance and enjoy watching all the latest moves. I was a bit scared as Ashabi twerked, the babe must have spent hours perfecting her skills. She was good and even gave us pointers. Said Serena Williams has a video teaching people to twerk. Until I see it, I do not believe. It feels good to just break out of the routine.

   As we walked into our home, laughing and remembering all Ashabi's moves. Celine and I, sing on top of our voice and bump into Mr. H.
'My sweetheart is home', I hug him.
'I see you ladies had fun'
'I have a Skype call to catch, night night love birds'
Celine walks away, dancing and enjoying herself.
'Are you hungry?'
'I've eaten, got you lobsters...'
'Where? I'm hungry'
  Mr. H watched me crack open the lobsters and then I stop.
'What?'
'How was your day?'
'Fantastic, I got an extra client. Two now...'
'Congratulations'
I blow him a kiss.
'How is Baratu?'
'She's good, wants to meet you'
'Good, we can double date...'
'What?'
'Nothing'
  I try not to look at him.
'You met with Chief Ojora?'
'And his nephew', I don't want him hearing about this from outside source.
'I see'
   I keep cracking and devouring the lobsters and realize he is no longer speaking. After cleaning the table and washing my hands. I watch him and can tell he is not happy.
'Is it my double date joke?'
'You like him....'
'And you like what's her name?'
'Let's not be that couple'
'We are not?'
'What is wrong?'
'There will always be a Frank, a Daniel, a Baratu...'
'And your point?'
  I really didn't want to have to say it.
'In fact, let's just let this go. For peace sake'
'No, Ade. I can tell I am losing you'
'How?'
''Ade, I  want Ajoke's wedding pressure  off and then I will propose and we will make it official'
 That's in three months, we will make it official. How nice of him.
'Perfect'
I hug him and walk away.
'I don't want us sleeping apart'
'That's not good o, we will be three months pregnant in three months'
  He hugs me and I can feel it, he is right. Things are beginning to feel different.
'Let's try to mend this, talk about everything'
  I look into his eyes and ask myself.

   Do I really want to mend this, or start all over again? After all, love is not all there is to life.

 



**Season 1, Episode 30**
"ADE'S JOURNAL" 30, COPYRIGHT 2016 **
**BUSOLA ELEGBEDE, COPYRIGHT 2016**
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