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About Me

My photo

 My story may shock you, but then again your situation may be worse. Delve in and find out....
The best moments are the ones when, that affect people positively and inspire them to laugh and live. 
             But is this, the entire story?
 The Human experience is Unique and every person has something to give, you just need to see it from my perspective and I craft words, actions and events from this very human angle.

Ade's Journal Part 6

Ade's Journal Part 6
My Valentine & The Elegance Of A Clean Breakup

Ade's Journal Part 5

Ade's Journal Part 5
My Scrumptious Valentine Kiss

Ade's Journal Part 4

Ade's Journal Part 4
A Scorpion is not a Lobster

Ade's Journal Part 3

Ade's Journal Part 3
My Insane Week Before Valentine

Ade's Journal Part 2

Ade's Journal Part 2
He Had The Guts To Come Back

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Wednesday, 18 April 2018

Turtle Necked Suited Suitor


"ADE'S JOURNAL", 19

     The root of all things reveals much more than its blossoms or its fruits. To see the flat dark brown twin casing, hiding within its protruding hollow roots and petals from its Beautiful flowers littered around it. A botanist whispered in my ears about dwarfs, a name close to the hybrid car and van... The Sienna and bragged about the tree also native to Florida. I had no clue what she was talking about, so I asked and listened closely. She did say dwarf and kind of point and then I raised my eyebrows. Its a Dwarf Poinciana tree, Caesalpinia pulcherrima. The botanical name, I was sure I would not remember. But the dwarf poinciana tree, stays fresh on my mind and will be the picture that adds colour to my dreams.
 Reminds me of my colourful childhood and fun filled adventures in Kaduna. Not too far from my favorite tree is the gully that haunts my dreams. A place I wanted to slide down as a child and just go on my adventure for life. This limestone plagued gully erosion maze, lies not too far from my childhood home in the military base I grew up in. The same one where an owl found its way into our water tank and delayed my bath for the first time since I could hold a memory. That was during the day, it took forever for plumbers to clean and clear the tank. I didn't complain, I had three siblings keeping me busy. We count all the stair cases in the house and each revolution of the fans. Imagined we were flying from the top of the stairs, down to an angry sea. Pretended to be chefs, as I trained my sous chefs on what and how to prepare meals. Even though, in the real world the meal was just bread and butter with sliced boiled eggs. We try to spin like Olympic ice skaters and as the world's horizon, swayed and tilts like sludge trapped in a small glass globe. We all collapse on the floor as it swayed some more and then goes back to its original horizontal plane. Not showering early morning during the holidays, I wish more owls would choose our water tankers as their final resting place. I seriously doubt it though, because I heard my mum telling them to get a new water tank. This time it would have a lid which will be screwed down, unlike the former one that was shut like a gift box lid.
And now, finally i had a bath. Not joyfully, but with a lot of grumbling and complaining. I truly believed that as first born, I should get to choose to do a lot of stuff first. Instead my mum and dad made me have a bath first and be punished first. Oh well, that was just my morning. Just after dinner time, I had captured and relocated ten antlions and as giant bugs slammed into our florescent lights at night. I quickly grab them and place them in mesh containers that used to contain candy. My sister did not mind the antlions but winged insects freaked her out. So my bug adventure were always with our neighbors. Boys that tried to catch up with my love for nature and my curiosity about worms and ants  I loved my time as a child, I was fearless and free and borderless and like a comic book blurring images, to show flash backs. My dream fades and I wake up...
 'We are here', Ashabi announced and I stretched and sit up.
I have never gone out with just Ajoke's sister, because of their clash of personalities and competitive behaviour. But this time, Ajoke begged me to go with her little sister who married a man I think four decades older.
'This will be fun', Ashabi adds in her skin tight outfit I made for her.
'This dress should not be tight', I complained because I made sure I used her exact measurements.
'I took in an inch, how will people know I am sexy?'
 I massaged my forehead, what about how I will look. Me the designer is not particularly happy, right now.
'Don't worry, it is only tight because I am sitting down. I will stand throughout and we will leave in an hour'
 Thank God I dressed to kill, this Ashabi dresses like a runway model. The outfit was stunning and the mermaid dress with twin peplum around her waist made me proud. She was pregnant, I think because her breasts seem to have doubled. But I could not be sure these days, the magic of bras and boobs job tricked us all.
Ashabi was tall and her legs ran for a mile and when the paparazzi asked who designed her dress.
 She spread her arms towards me and screamed, 'taadaa'
 It feels good to be appreciated and as I described my unique creation with my hybrid puff sleeves with a unique slant cuff. I was glad Ashabi invited me for this event.
 Ask me what event it is, and I had no answer.
From the crowd of people, I could tell it was her party. A celebration of life, achievements and an excuse to party.
When the paparazzi had their fill, Ashabi starts to lament.
'You know your clique is now boring..'
'Who? Me?'
'No, your shadow'
 That was childish of her, although I was a little absent minded. I was reliving my childhood as a day dream.
'You slept all throughout our journey here and now with all the music you are day dreaming'
'Ashabi...'
'Ade, you all went art shopping last weekend. Even Ajoke joined you, we used to laugh and abuse you and Henrik. Now she has become you'
 I feel like I should be annoyed right now, instead I am laughing.
'You are not even bothered about the revelation I just gave you about one of your best friends'
'Ajoke didn't hide her disdain for my love for the arts, she has come to love it'
'I just go with the flow and for me it's an investment or revenge tool'
''Revenge tool?', I was confused.
'I don't buy paintings less than five million naira and only buy when Chuks is getting bored with me or interested in another woman'
 I laughed again.
'Is it funny?'
''Kind of', I add.
'Good, I want you to meet Chuks friend'
'Why?', I was irritated because I see her trying to matchmake me even though my husband died just last year.
'I did not say sleep with him or date him, I said meet him'
 And she dragged me towards a man.
''He likes you but that's not the point, he has nine sisters. All tall and all into modeling and acting in Nollywood. They loved the design but said I should make it a bit tighter'
'So you got me clients'
'If you get back out there, you will be up to date with the world. And I can have my fun clique back and make my own friends jealous'
Ashabi spots him and stops moving, I was wondering why. And then I looked up and see my Turtle Necked Suited Suitor.
His outfit was like from a bad eighties comedy, he looked like someone trying to be a pimp and failing.
I laughed so hard that I started to cry and then hid my face in shame in Ashabi's chest. She was laughing too and then he approached us and I fought hard to stay composed.
He was nice but his diction was all over the place, Emma was a real life character I could have invented for my fictional screenplays. Only he was real, he sacrificed all his education and finesse to empower his sister's and stop them from becoming house maids. His househelp agency helped educate them and then he changed it to a model agency. He negotiated high for his sister's and continued to do so. He wanted me to dress them and involve the youngest in my August reality show special. He was thorough and did not waste time.
A real blessing in disguise and when his sister's stepped in, I smiled. They were a lovely dark hue of tall black girls in natural hair. Great business for my brand and as Ashabi squealed and they echoed the same sound, I needed with joy and whispered.
'Thanks you God'
 Just as I started to celebrate, one shoved away a lady and made a scene about her been in her personal space. These were divas and I did not know if a clash of my friends and Ashabi's friends would work right now or ever.


  •   It's true what they say, be careful what you wish for.....




**"ADE'S JOURNAL", Season 3, Episode 19**
*"ADE'S JOURNAL", 19, COPYRIGHT 2018*
**BUSOLA ELEGBEDE, COPYRIGHT 2018**
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