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Ade's Journal Part 6

Ade's Journal Part 6
My Valentine & The Elegance Of A Clean Breakup

Ade's Journal Part 5

Ade's Journal Part 5
My Scrumptious Valentine Kiss

Ade's Journal Part 4

Ade's Journal Part 4
A Scorpion is not a Lobster

Ade's Journal Part 3

Ade's Journal Part 3
My Insane Week Before Valentine

Ade's Journal Part 2

Ade's Journal Part 2
He Had The Guts To Come Back

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Tuesday, 17 September 2019

A Time To Remember


"ADE'S JOURNAL", 5

  Scores of time have drifted away and I'm still here wondering, pondering on why I'm here. I stare with a bland look at my audience as they watch me, judge me and expect me to do it all. Have I done enough?
Do I do so much more or am I wasting my time. I tilt my waist to the side and scrunch my tummy inwards. The tension I inflict in my tense spread out palm ensures it's stagnant and then I inhale. The capacity of my lungs to collect oxygen all at once stimulates me. And then I launch downwards into an invisible Lagoon and start my Bata dance. Twisting and slamming my bare feet into a hollow wooden stage, my waist did not betray me and the dance thrilled my audience.
''Mo ti de', I declare beating my chest and launching downwards and swaying to a melodious echoing rythm that refreshes my smile with every beat. I am intoxicated by my indigenous music, my very own Yoruba sound. I am home.

     Nothing about this moment makes sense, everything is wrong. From the fact that a man was in my room and the additional fact that Ajoke let him. I am displeased by it all and try to voice my opinion. Nothing exits my dry mouth and I feel the need to flood my palette with something. Watching them, I reach out and find it. My cylindrical bottle and then I open my calcium supplements and bite into it's edge, the dry flavored tablet piece bursts into bubbles that made me wake up and sit up.
It was like I was in a dream within a dream and I try hard to find something familiar. Some kind of object or moment, somewhere I could recognize.
'Ade?', Ajoke said as if she asked me a question before now.
'What are you two doing here?'
 I was referring to Daniel Ojora and Ajoke but as I grab and prop the pillow up against the bed frame, I knew I was lost.
The soft fabric sank as my fingers touched it and I feel it more and rest my cheek on it. It was amazingly soft and comfortable. Only either of these two would splurge and spend this much on bedsheets.
'Ade, you obviously didn't open my birthday gift to you, because it's what I gave all my friends'
'Are you referring to this?', I asked caressing the bedsheets.
'Are you alright?'
 I knew I wasn't and I did not know why, and just in case it wasn't a dream I didn't want to say too much.
   The handsome man joined me on the bed and touched my forehead, his strong palm was cold and his dark brown eyes dreamy.
'Ade', Ajoke shouts and I sit up and stop smiling sheepishly.
'She's acting drunk?', Ajoke grumbled a lot worried about me, her best friend.
'She mixed alcohol with her medication', Daniel reassures me, showing Ajoke my mix of medication.
I smile stupidly and had the sudden urge to jump up and dance. The last time I mixed up my medication, I threw up continuously for ten minutes. Then had the urge to party.
How come I always want to dance after a shocking and embarrassing situation?
'Is she going to start dancing again?''
'Ajoke I don't like it ooo', I grumble and return my bum to the comfortable bed.
 So I was not dreaming, but this is a first for me. I mean, alcohol and medication. I feel weird and almost as if I am watching myself.
'Fluids and rest, is what the doctor ordered'
'Ive seen a doctor?', I ask yawning hard and long.
'Ade please, your pulse is low. So we need you to take it easy'
'Should'nt I run, so it climbs?', it was a silly question but I had to ask. My opinion seemed to make sense but just as I wanted to run, I also was falling asleep.
'It could be a number of things like...', Ajoke tries to explain.
'My heart is bad and I need a pacemaker', I add yawning quietly.
'Ade, your heart is fine. Only you are a lot paranoid. Frankly, I liked you better when you filled in your journal with your bouyant life. I looked forward to your adventures and uplifting life, but it's like since your long month of finger Wicklow trauma. You just died''

   Silence.

    I was actually listening to her and trying to analyze what she just said, it's not true. I watch tears well up her eyes and could not believe she was about to cry.
 In a way, she is right, I have become a well-put-together mechanical being. Almost predictable and monotonous, I have become that woman I described as bland but nice looking. I would like to add a lot miserable and sad. I smile but I'm not happy, I laugh but inside I am placid.
So bland that I did not remember I had taken my medication and overdosed and worse had whiskey on top of it. Since when do I drink whiskey? I think I had a little wine and a punch with some rum in it. The mixing of alcohol is not like me and I did it to change that bitter powdery taste on my tongue. I need a full medical check up, there may be more to my craze.
  How can this be me?
 You need to see my Instagram pictures,s  happy glammed up and my Twitter feed was full of motivation and uplifting messages. So what exactly is happening?
   I stare at Ajoke and get nervous, she may be onto me. I shake my head and then start to bite my finger and feel a sharp pain from my former Wicklow finger. Another phantom pain and residual effect from that month long finger Wicklow trauma. It makes me stop and then she hands me the ice cream bowl in her hand. I collect it and take a bite at the melting mess that mirrored my life.
    I
 was too caught up to notice but I suspect Daniel gave Ajoke a signal because she left.
  I was sad and afraid and Daniel holds my hand and this time it is warm.
'You will be fine', he says and I watch his lips.
I don't remember how being kissed feels like or the warm embrace of a lover. All I feel is cold and upset, it makes me shiver.
 My dear friend takes the ice cream bowl from me and turns me around and we embrace. It made me relax and I curl up into him and shut my eyes.
He kissed my ear and I smile and tilt my head towards him and air kiss him.
  I fall deep into a large transparent waterbed and we both fall asleep and I smile so hard it makes me giggle and then grab onto the drum. This beautiful Bata drum I have dreamed of all my life.

   Waking up to his prickly face startles me but he is not asleep, he is watching me. Touching my face and I his and we start to kiss again and again until I hear a loud screech.
  I jump up and watch the door as Hassan and Hussein's slam open the door and race in. The twins have grown and Bala followed them as if trying to keep up.
They jump on the bed and hug me so tight and I turn to Daniel.
'I so want one of each'
 Daniel smiled at me and whispered,'you are definitely not going home ever again'
 Bala stopped moving and stands upright.
'Did I hear you right?'
 Ajoke walks in with cups that had straws embedded in them and warm cocoa drink.
'What did you hear?', she asked innocently.
'Not going home, not going home', the twins echoed and jumped up and down the bed.
Ajoke holds the tea to her heart while her adrenaline fueled children jump and try to catch the cups in their mum's hands.

  Life is interesting, annoying, stagnant, fast paced and fun, all at once. And as I think of friends I've gained and lost, it makes me rethink my priorities and try not to take life too seriously. I guess it's time, I am ready for this adventure. I think, this is going to be a Time To Remember.





**"ADE'S JOURNAL", Season 4, Episode 5**
*"ADE'S JOURNAL", 5, COPYRIGHT 2019*

**BUSOLA ELEGBEDE, COPYRIGHT 2019**
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