Amidst The Chaos, A Proposal?

All gone from my Paws, clogged up with disjointed truths. I know I'll grow to Love all my favorite plus, i have honed as life jabs me again and again over this period called time. Haughtily, I take off my gloves of all my friends with comma's and stick only to apostrophe's. Spring up and wake from a comatose state shoved on me by many years of my own clouded reality. Angered seriously by silly gloss painted mirage of fake friendship I wished I had long lost. When my dear, will I finally say goodbye, to all the chaos in my life?
      Yes, my mind races to a synergy of chaotic words, that jumbles up when I feel lost. Yes ooo, you should know that by now, that's just how emotionally, I feel.
 True to God I should be resting, relaxed at my place or Mr. H's. Instead, I am driving at night, looking for a police station on Victoria Island Street. Not sure where it is, exactly, I drive as if I am going to the Bar Beach and try not to miss the right turn into the street Mr. H described.
   What a mess this my stupid friend has made, why? When I've closed that chapter with her for good. Why, is she forcing herself back into my life?

   Since I can't find the police station, my boo suggests that I meet him at Bungalow. I am not too sure, if I can still locate the place and stretch my neck like an ostrich out of my car, trying to find him, till it hurts. I am praying and fighting hard to stay calm. I spot him and smile, Mr. H was standing folding his arms and rocking himself.
 I parked and stepped out of the car and he did not approach me. Wahala, a sure sign that this, was a serious matter. I go to him and hug him and try to detoxify his rage with my love. He starts to relax and hugs me back. Then lifts me up and laughs, I was confused.
'I scared you, didn't I?', Mr. H tried to distract me with his bedroom voice but I didn't buy it. Wait o...
You know how my mind jumps and concludes the worse kind of scenario? I try not to think all this, is one big massive joke.
'Did Bala really report Khadijatu? Has it been sorted out? Or is this all a prank?'.
Don't you just like how prim and proper words spring up from my mouth when I'm around Mr. H.
'Yes, it has been sorted out', and he planted a dry innocent kiss on my forehead.
'How?'
'Bala wants us to meet...', Mr. H led me into the restaurant and I stop him.
'Did he actually report her to the police?'
Call me naive but, I didn't know people actually reported stalkers to the police in this country.
Mr. H nodded his head, 'yes he did. He said it was for his own protection. He printed out the Cellular network details and....'
'Did the police, notify Khadijatu?'
'Oh yes, she got served a notice, legally and knows she has a file at the police station...'
'My goodness, that is extreme'
'Bala, is superstitious and believes strongly that there are never any empty threats to his life...'
'Eh hehn, wonders shall never end. If I, file reports on all the guys that have stalked me since my teenage years eh....'
Mr. H stopped me and pulled me closer, I did not appreciate been rudely interrupted.
'My precious Ade, then those guys won't have the guts to harass others. And if they do, they already have an active file...'
'Wow, I'm still in shock...', my eyes danced around and stopped at his dark piercing eyes. I forgot what I was saying and just admired his fresh face.
'So, the next time your security spots Frank.. He gets an active file at the station'.

   Mr. H's statement took me by surprise and we were both silent for about ten seconds.
Then, as if we planned it, we both burst out laughing.
  In the dark, I look away briefly feeling a little bit guilty. Not that I didn't tell him or that, I plan to hide anything from Mr. H, but I was curious to see how Frank and Khadijatu would pan out.
  It is a beautiful restaurant and their food is fresh and delicious, sea food of course. I am a sucker for Lobster, prawns, crabs but I don't go near octopus and squids. I like my protein with some form of skeleton, exo or endoskeleton.

  I heard her first before I caught sight of the loud woman causing a racket in the restaurant as people pointed at her. She was beautiful, had deep dark even flawless skin and a figure to die for. And please dont judge me oh, but that hair, its the longest human hair weave, I have ever seen in my entire life. It was in even spiral curls, down to her ankles. For why now? I calculated how long it would take to get the hair in such perfect curls and the amount of hair serum she would need and got a headache. Her fitted short nude color gown fit like gloves and her heels were at least six inches. Her bag was massive and I did not know the designer and her makeup on point. She looked like she belonged in a glossy magazine and I watched her, scrutinized all the men in the room, curious to see who her date is. Mr. H smiled at her and she shrieked and ran towards us. I watched her hug me and say she's heard so much about me. Much as she tried to mask it, her thick ijile Yoruba accent clouded her speech. I was shielding my face from her claws and kisses, a little confused.

Why was she hugging me?

 Mr. H laughed and my mind races to the impossible, could this be... No way, he would have told me. Maybe it's really his daughter? I tried to see some sort of resemblance and did not find any. Maybe he had her when he was in secondary school...
'Meet Ajoke... Ajoke, meet Ade'
She shrieked again and hugged me then dragged me to our table.
I was afraid of falling on my own three and a half inch heels and she was comfortable in her six inches. I looked at Mr H and had questions on my lips but he just laughed.
'You'll see...'
Bala approached and I said, 'okkkkayyyyy...'.
Mr. H squeezed my hand and shook his head.
'It's not his daughter?', I whispered in Mr. H's ears. He shook his head again and looked straight at Ajoke. I realized I was ignoring her.

   So I turned to her and smiled, 'Ajoke hi...'.
'Bala could not understand why, but I insisted that I meet the woman that has stolen Mr. H's heart', and she side hugged me.

Chineke, una dey hear wetin I dey hear?
This babe has been in the picture and this is the first time I am hearing about her.

Chai, na real wa.

  Bala joined us and shook my hand, Ajoke jumped up from her chair, grabbed and hugged him from behind and Bala laughed.
'See this woman o, she just dey tap current for public. Come on, go and sit down'. Bala was serious and Ajoke laughed.
'That's your problem Alhaji, you take life too seriously. Calm down and come and sit beside me'.
'What about our food, so you expect Ade to...'
'Let's go and get it', and like a love drunk puppy he followed her, admiring her as he did.
What did I just witness? Bala taking orders and laughing, this Bala was totally different from the one with Khadijatu. But wait o, if he was with my friend and with Ajoke then this is nasty.
I folded my hand across my chest, and looked straight at Mr. H.
'So this is how it is?'
'What do you mean?'
'Khadijatu's, ink is not dry and she has been replaced, in fact...'
'.... Bala wants to get married and gets very busy, but your friend could not handle days without communicating and turned to a stalker...'
'The point is, my dear he was two timing and you know what they say. Show me your friends and...'
'If we both want to believe that, then you will sleep with Khadijatu's boyfriend and stalk another'.
My mouth was still open, Mr. H got me there and I shut my mouth.
'You, my dear need to learn to let go and move forward'

So, I am childish and hold on to things, abi? It's not his fault, I blame myself for landing in this mess. How can he compare me to that Judas, to that unserious girl? Yes, I know I started it but, ah, ah. Kilode? Mr. H went too far. But, I realize I am puffing up with rage, so I try to be sensible.....
   I start to count to twenty because if I had answered eh.... In fact, let's just leave it there. Mr. H watched me and counted with me and I stopped.
'Was I that obvious?
Mr. H laughs and i turn to the couple, Ajoke screeched and slapped Bala who warned her and she apologized. Everyone was watching the very interesting entertaining couple.
'Do they look happy together?'
'Like two agbalumo seeds in a cherry'
Mr. H looks at me and laughs, 'Ade, you are too funny'.
Mr. H squeezed my hands and leaned closer.
'You can see that Ajoke is loud and Bala isn't, they have dated on and off throughout last year, but he didn't think he could live with it. But after one disastrous date after another and three stalkers. He has decided she is perfect for him'.

     I was lost in thoughts wondering how, I could tell how Mr. H feels.
'The moment my eyes caught yours at the Abuja party two years ago. I knew'.
'But you didn't come after me..'
'You were into Frank then...'
'Did you know he was married?'
'No, only that you two were planning to...'
Mr. H puts his hand in his blazer pocket and hands me a gift box.
'Aww, I didn't get you anything...', I said unwrapping my gift. I stopped and gave Mr. H, a warm hug. I wanted to stay there but returned to sit. It was a six layered gold necklace with... Em, I was not sure if it was...
'A blue sapphire to line up your sky line'.
So he says its saphire, i wouldnever guess and matching earrings. I loved it, all of it.
'Or it's too small?'
I screamed, 'no o' and we both laugh.
Ajoke ran back to our table, 'Gist me, Gist me, what's up, what's upu?'
Bala tapped me, 'I see you are finally laughing' and he sat down.
'Ade, that your friend put the fear of God inside me o. Walahi, she called my phone one hundred times'.
Everyone but me, laughed and I just raised my eyebrows and curved my lips downwards.
'But it's a good thing she did, she reminded me to stick to what you know'. He raised Ajoke's hand and she raised both like she was on a roller coaster ride.
'Weeeeee...'
'It's okay..', Bala stopped her 'weee' that didn't want to end. He brought out a ring case.
'It's a lie...', me and Ajoke echoed. I was truly in shock.

Is Bala going to propose?

Bala leaned forward and Ajoke fanned her face with her hands and acrylic silverish brown nails. I swear, remain small for the babe to fly.

'Because you are my choice, let's marry have children and respect each other and our families'.

   That was it, he didn't get on any one knee, he said it and Ajoke screamed 'yes'.
They hugged and she tried on the ring, it didn't even fit, but she did not mind. She showed me the massive rock and I swear it looked as large as Mariah Careh's engagement rock.
'Today is really special, naturally Mr. H here is my best man', Bala announced.
Mr. H nodded.
'And you, Ade will be my chief bridesmaids'.
I laughed and stopped, he was serious.
'We have discussed the possibility and Ajoke said her friends are too razz, local...', Bala added. Ajoke cut in and grabbed my hands as she spoke.
'They are already fighting over the possibility and I don't want to be in the middle. Will you do it, will you do it, will you do it?'
  Before I could answer.
'There's more, my sister's were my last two chief bridesmaids and they think they jinxed my wedding. So I don't want any of them. And the chief bridesmaid is also a public relations officer for the wedding'
'Wow, it sounds like a carnival...'
'Close, I've seen the two weddings, I will give you the cd's', Ajoke added.
I laughed.
'Seriously, you have to learn the names or they will think you are dumb', Ajoke said with her eyes following the food that just arrived.
'So what do you say, will you be my chief bridesmaid?'
   I watched all six eyes follow my expression and nod and scream, 'yes'.
'You see, she's more like me', Ajoke announced and we both echoed, 'yes'. Her pure joy and upbeat personality was infectious and I had a fun night.

You see, God answers prayers, just ask and you will change your horrible friends. Just like that.

  The drive home was quiet and I kept looking in my rearview mirror to see where his car was. Mr. H smiled at me and as we got to my house. He handed me the chilled bottle of red wine from the mini fridge in his car. I watched as he helped me start my generator. After several tries, it started and we walked into my home arm in arm.

   I pour us glasses of wine and sit down opposite not beside him.
'So, Bala has been married twice...'
'Yes'
'Where are they?'
'With their kids, one the first wife has two girls and the other has a boy'
'So...'
'They married Young, his first marriage and they both agreed to move on. The second wife didn't like that he was always busy, she has remarried'
'But that proposal was cold...'
'Ajoke liked it...'
'My goodness it was ice cold...'
'Beside the point... So how would you?'
'Would I what?'
I was giggling like a child and he kissed me.
'Don't worry, I would never propose'
'What?'

  I sat up and spilled wine on myself, he did not just say that. I sucked my wine stained hands and he squinted and watched me. He was enjoying himself and I stopped.
'You would never, what?'
'Propose like that, I have more style and if you don't know by now, I am sensitive'
Nice recovery because he would have seen my red eyes.
    Nonsense and ingredients.
He kissed my neck and I giggled, 'that tickles'.
'But seriously....'
'Ssshh, don't jinx it...'
And he silenced me with a kiss. I forgot what I was going to say and just sunk into the moment.

   Yes, I stopped it before it got far and yes it was not easy. But i want all my prayers to go straight up and not hang because of my sins. I watched him drive off and thought I saw Frank in the corner not far from my gate. I stared hard and realized it's just a Dongoyaro tree swaying and bowing to the force of the wind.
I lock the gate and hurry into my house, use all the padlocks, checked and made sure all the windows were locked. My phone rang and i raced to it and picked it up.
'Are you home, sweety?'
'Yes, i am. Are you on your bed?'
'Not yet....'
'Its getting harder to leave your house'
'Eh hehn, my house not me eh...'
'Ade, the only reason i come to the mainland is because of you....'
'Well, all the assets are here on the mainland, you islanders only know how to create good cash flow if not... Who will go to the island'.
We both laugh.
'I'm glad you know'
I laugh.
'So how are we going to solve this distance problem?'
I wanted to shout, propose and let's get on with it. I did not know where that line of thought was coming from.
'We will sort it out by tomorrow, night, night my Scrumptious Ade'
'Night,  night my delicious Mr. H', I cut the phone and laughed out aloud.

  I was happy and I picked up my phone and started to dial Khadijatu's number and stopped. Like a drug, every event that happened today rushed through my brain and I swooned.
I deleted her number and sighed heavily, and stared at my phone. I had lost a good friend and now I had gained two more.
Nnoye and Ajoke and my goodness I was going to be a chief bridesmaid. I had to study for the role and there was a business opportunity tied to the title.
  This is the life, I have really been looking forward to.
I crashed backwards into my bed and stretched. For the first time in a long time, I was truly fulfilled.

My phone rang and I picked it up, 'sweety...'.
'Why did you act like you did not see me?'
I was a bit confused.
'Who is this?'
'Now you don't know who this is...'.
I realized it was Frank
'What did the faker want?'
'I am outside, come and open the door', I threw the phone on my bed.
Rubbish.
Bang! Bang! Bang! The noise at my door startled me.
'Open the door', the mad man was screaming and I jumped out of my bed.......



**Season 1, Episode 10**