The first time you crash land here, you can’t help but feel despair. Carcasses, they say line the streets with broken dreams. Too exhausted to move from trying and screaming into your ears about efforts long gone and forgotten. Raging words directed at Agberos, ever ready to feast and work and earn from extorting those that we've the masses. Do I sound like I am praising them a bit? Just look at them, those that care for their outward look and do not shout, the presentable ones. Versus those that have no care for their hygiene and have scars and mouths, absent of teeth. There is a lesson there and it's called packaging. Never stop or look confused, it’s a sure formula for doom. Step out from your fumbling chair, your comfort zone and do something, anything. Get into the captain’s ship. Act like an enraged man with a whip. You’ll be fine; today you are the lion in your den. No one will dine, on you a former frightened little lost hen. Oh yes I forgot the carcasses are all around you. Racing like you to catch a one way ticket to doom. Change your destiny, grab the bull by its oversized razor sharp horn and fight. Never give up, just look in the news, but don't be confused. Yes, you read it riggt. Extradited And Convicted Yet Celebrated, help me understand this mayhem this madness my people are displaying. It's called conditioning, you have been brainwashed to celebrate bad girls, to admire bad boys, to vote for the loudest critic and rejoice with the enormous looters. Deceit has made the sting like honey from a viper. And as it Swims swiftly in your veins, all around. I can’t help but wonder, why I cannot have a second of fame and fortune, okay I'll settle for riches.
How quickly I ran away from all that is wrong, and my reward is a life of torment and failed efforts. I'm tired of saying, I’ll stay here and get it. Even though it floats away from my grasps. It’s here, where I’ll make it. That’s what they all say, right? How come I didn’t see her, buried beneath all that disguise. Now I know she’s a joker, for her venom sweet and kosher. I’m tired but I’ll go on. Don’t mind if it takes long, must stand and pay the price.Get going take a flight, maybe they are waiting for me. But I'm not in denial, nothing is for free. Like honey from a viper, I'll endure it all. After all, I have learned there's no way forward. Swim swiftly all around, as I unapologetically become this version of me.
'If you like, look at me like I carry shit on top my head's
The insane girl still does not see anything wrong with what she has done.
'Ade, I am not sorry. And if you like, unfriend and unfollow me on social media. The entire world knows we are friends'
'Nnoye, you take this need to be rich and famous too far'
'How?'
Did she just ask me that stupid question? Wonders shall never end, see me see trouble oo.
'Nnoye, 'Abeg start going before my husband gets back from work'
I pushed her and she refused to move.
'Ade, i am not going anywhere. Besides, you disappoint me big time '
''Because you had the guts...'
My silly friend was scrolling through her smart phone, the latest iPhone for that matter. It looks good and I am distracted for a minute.
'Even you, know a good thing when you see it'
'It's blood money'
'How?'
'It's money to improve the lives of Nigerians'
'It's because God blessed you, me everything failed. I am only doing what is right. I have collected my share and it will open my high end boutique'
I clapped my hands three times, still shocked by my friends attitude.
'History, will record it that I support James Ibori'
'He is a convicted...'
Did she let me land? No ooo, my friend defended him as if she would die if I don't believe her.
'And the others that divert Nigeria's money, how much has empowered you?'
'What will you tell Etim, your son?'
'That he traveled abroad for the first time in his life because of this man. That mummy can pay school fees for two years and open a high end shop because of him'
'Don't justify crime'
I was disappointed in my friend, she was one of the Nigerians celebrating him and had shamefully taken selfies with him on social media platforms.
'Ade, thank God for God. Nothing happens by accident, I am empowered because of him'
The knock on my door scared me, I was worried that security agencies have tailed her to my house. I hope they know I work hard for my own money and have not used any diverted funds to fund my business.
I unlocked the door and realized it was Henrik.
'Why did you lock it from inside the house?'
He ends his question with a quick wet kiss and I point at Nnoye.
Bala, Ajoke and the twins are behind him and they shriek when they spot Nnoye. Ajoke hands the twins to Bala and marched in front of Nnoye.
'You this scandalous babe, are you a politician?'
'I don't even have a voters card', Nnoye answered flashing her freshly made nails.
Ajoke grabbed her new iPhone and screamed.
'Traitor'
'You two married rich, I had to find my own level'
'For real, you are justifying this', Henrik could not hide his disgust.
'If I can not have my own opinion and choose something different from what you all agree is right. Then you all would throw me out of the group, right?'
It was all orchestrated to make us sound bad, very typical of Nnoye.
'I was not ideal enough to marry Daniel, and none of you fought for me'
'You had an affair', Henrik adds and shakes his head.
'Yes, I made a mistake, but Daniel too has had an affair. Did you all chuck him out of the group?'
I wanted to say that there was no proof and that Daniel just kissed Linda and that he and Opeyemi were still together. But I was not sure of anything and had been Dodging Opeyemi almost all week.
Nnoye vwas right, we treated her different and her lower class attitude confused us. And it's the same with this her trip to London, it also shocked me. But I didn't have extra money to give anyone. My father was going to be seventy in April and I was always going to live within my means. Nnoye on the other hand, fought tooth and nail to climb up the society totem. I never cared for it, but somehow, I'm in the mix.
The horizon is bleak and the challenges are endless, but I don't think ill ever compromise my morals to get what I want.
Henrik shakes his head and gets a bottle of vodka and Bailey's Irish cream.
'So, have I been officially chucked out and ostracized from the crew?'
Ajoke and Bala turn to Henrik and I, and I chuckled. It seems we were the ones with the ball in our court. Henrik pours Bala a drink and Ajoke pours herself some cranberry juice. I pour myself some Bailey's Irish cream and watch a nervous Nnoye watch me.
Henrik points at me and takes his drink and I up mine and frown. The tension in the room was much and I spread my lips and smiled and the shake my head.
Nnoye dives on me and hugs and rocks me.
'Thank you, so many people have criticized me and blocked me on social media. Just ten thousand naira, they could not give me and I had to drop all my yanga and damn all the consequences'
'Nnoye, we may still be friends, but i can no longer be public about our friendship. You have politicized your stance in the society and I cannot stand with you'
'No wahala, just let us remain friends, deal?'
Arms stretched far and wide towards me, open and limp with no tension. All of which, adds up and shouts that, my naive shallow, money grubbing friend acts with no prejudice. I on the other hand, can not in good faith, forgive her for people assuming we are alike. For goodness sake, my mum called me and accused me of all sort of shenanigans. I defended myself and used reverse psychology to make my own mother feel guilty of thinking I could ever sell my soul for money.
'Ade, say what is on your mind'
I look at Ajoke, she shakes her head and disagrees with Nnoye's suggestion.
Nnoye suspects and turns around and gives Ajoke a questioning look
'What?', Ajoke's guilty look could not be masked by any words.
'You sold your soul ', I add.
'Na today?'
'Before now, we used to laugh and joke about people like you'
'Before land fees and taxes, before either of us had kids. Your parents worked for almost thirty years. They receive pensions, mine could not find any and cannot afford to buy blood pressure medicine. Do You know the price of blood pressure drugs?'
I shake my head.
'It's a thousand, per week and yours have the machine at home, mine have to pay five hundred naira transport to get there and pay to use it. And before you accuse me of wearing shoes that can pay for their drugs for a month. You know your crowd wouldn't let me in, with my cheap shoes. Ajoke still snob's me...'
'Nnoye, 'Abeg o. No put me for this fight. I snob everybody, so make up with your best friend'
I massaged my forehead and rest my aching head backwards, into my couch.
'Don't judge me, until you've lived like me, walked in my shoes'
I exhaled hard and squeezed Henrik's hands. All Nnoye's words sound like excuses, but it's her life and choice. I am tired.
Nnoye takes my silence to mean contempt and starts to leave. A part of me is relieved but another part of me knows that she will always be genuine with me. I stretch my hands and say the words, my parents will not be happy with.
'Deal'
This world is different, saints and sinners mingle and like I suspect, soon there will be no difference.
The rest of the day was filled with shocking stories Nnoye experienced, with grown men and women as extreme entourage members. People, feeding families from following and running errands, for extremely rich politicians.
My mouth fell open and it was Ajoke's intervention that shut it for me.
Babanla, orisirisi.
Dawn is here and the New Year, draws near. I am home alone, because Henrik had to fly to Port Harcourt last night.
My phone is ringing and I don't need to check who it is.
What did this Daniel Ojora cook for the women he dates? This Opeyemi, won't let me be. I do not like that she keeps calling me, but I am curious to hear her. Now that I am home alone.
Pretending to be waking up from sleep, I pick up my phone and drag my voice.
'Hello'
'Ade. Sorry, did I wake you?'
'Who is this?', I massaged my nose to sink in the sleepy effect.
'Hi, it's Opeyemi'
Again, she does not say her surname. All these artist's shaaaa.
'I have an exhibition near you and I have been painting all night'
'Really?'
'I need to talk to you'
'Now?'
'I don't want to carry this over to next year'
I laughed and throw my hands in the air, it's the first time she ever made me laugh. I always find her, too intense.
'I'm glad it's funny to you'
Now, I feel guilty.
'I'm not making light of your situation'
'I know, but you act like I'm so boring '
'Thats not true', I tried to sound serious.
'Thank you'
'For what?', now I'm confused.
'The selfie that snapped me out of limbo, with Daniel'
'I swear, I had no clue'
'I know, they looked happy. The kiss looked flawless, effortless. It even inspired my latest art work. It's called betrayal'
That was funny, but I could not laugh.
'Humor is how I get through heartbreak'
'We all go through it, somehow', i tried to calm her down.
'Will you come?'
Now, she was pushing it.
'I know where your loyalty lies, but please. Come, so I don't feel guilty because I was cheated on and then dumped'
Tragic and sad, was how she just described her life. I was curious to see how she Crafted it all into her work.
'You didn't do anything wrong, Daniel is one of those men, that marry when they are almost sixty'
'He's waiting for you'
'For where? He only shows interest because I am unavailable. When you have your family and your twins, we will all attend his wedding'
'Are you serious?'
'She will be in her late twenties'
Opeyemi was laughing so hard, I fell of the bed. I was laughing too and enjoying myself.
'Why didn't I relax and just enjoy our friendship?'
'When a relationship is wrong, it brings about depression and an almost, permanent bad mood'
'Are you talking from experience?'
'Opeyemi, I've dated the spawn of the devil himself. It was God Almighty that delivered me from him'
'I heard'
Not exactly the answer i was expecting, but I know how news of failed relationships spread. And as we grow older, we don't shy away from our mistakes. We are just thankful, we had the strength to escape the clutches of stagnation.
'I didn't mean to... Daniel told me'
'If he didn't, someone else would have. Don't worry, I'll be there and my crew too'
'And Nnoye?'
'She has her hands full '
I get, that Nnoye is very popular now. But, I do not want part of that fame. I want to be famous, for my hard work, for my designs and projects. And it's good to feature, once in awhile, in glamorous magazine's. But life, never changes. Sooner or later, the paparazzi always turns on you.
I love attention, but I also love my sanity.
So, today has the potential to be cool and calm or scandalous and chaotic.
Only God knows, which it's going to be..
**Season 1, Episode 95**
**"ADE'S JOURNAL", 95 COPYRIGHT 2016**
**BUSOLA ELEGBEDE, COPYRIGHT 2016**
Henrik shakes his head and gets a bottle of vodka and Bailey's Irish cream.
'So, have I been officially chucked out and ostracized from the crew?'
Ajoke and Bala turn to Henrik and I, and I chuckled. It seems we were the ones with the ball in our court. Henrik pours Bala a drink and Ajoke pours herself some cranberry juice. I pour myself some Bailey's Irish cream and watch a nervous Nnoye watch me.
Henrik points at me and takes his drink and I up mine and frown. The tension in the room was much and I spread my lips and smiled and the shake my head.
Nnoye dives on me and hugs and rocks me.
'Thank you, so many people have criticized me and blocked me on social media. Just ten thousand naira, they could not give me and I had to drop all my yanga and damn all the consequences'
'Nnoye, we may still be friends, but i can no longer be public about our friendship. You have politicized your stance in the society and I cannot stand with you'
'No wahala, just let us remain friends, deal?'
Arms stretched far and wide towards me, open and limp with no tension. All of which, adds up and shouts that, my naive shallow, money grubbing friend acts with no prejudice. I on the other hand, can not in good faith, forgive her for people assuming we are alike. For goodness sake, my mum called me and accused me of all sort of shenanigans. I defended myself and used reverse psychology to make my own mother feel guilty of thinking I could ever sell my soul for money.
'Ade, say what is on your mind'
I look at Ajoke, she shakes her head and disagrees with Nnoye's suggestion.
Nnoye suspects and turns around and gives Ajoke a questioning look
'What?', Ajoke's guilty look could not be masked by any words.
'You sold your soul ', I add.
'Na today?'
'Before now, we used to laugh and joke about people like you'
'Before land fees and taxes, before either of us had kids. Your parents worked for almost thirty years. They receive pensions, mine could not find any and cannot afford to buy blood pressure medicine. Do You know the price of blood pressure drugs?'
I shake my head.
'It's a thousand, per week and yours have the machine at home, mine have to pay five hundred naira transport to get there and pay to use it. And before you accuse me of wearing shoes that can pay for their drugs for a month. You know your crowd wouldn't let me in, with my cheap shoes. Ajoke still snob's me...'
'Nnoye, 'Abeg o. No put me for this fight. I snob everybody, so make up with your best friend'
I massaged my forehead and rest my aching head backwards, into my couch.
'Don't judge me, until you've lived like me, walked in my shoes'
I exhaled hard and squeezed Henrik's hands. All Nnoye's words sound like excuses, but it's her life and choice. I am tired.
Nnoye takes my silence to mean contempt and starts to leave. A part of me is relieved but another part of me knows that she will always be genuine with me. I stretch my hands and say the words, my parents will not be happy with.
'Deal'
This world is different, saints and sinners mingle and like I suspect, soon there will be no difference.
The rest of the day was filled with shocking stories Nnoye experienced, with grown men and women as extreme entourage members. People, feeding families from following and running errands, for extremely rich politicians.
My mouth fell open and it was Ajoke's intervention that shut it for me.
Babanla, orisirisi.
Dawn is here and the New Year, draws near. I am home alone, because Henrik had to fly to Port Harcourt last night.
My phone is ringing and I don't need to check who it is.
What did this Daniel Ojora cook for the women he dates? This Opeyemi, won't let me be. I do not like that she keeps calling me, but I am curious to hear her. Now that I am home alone.
Pretending to be waking up from sleep, I pick up my phone and drag my voice.
'Hello'
'Ade. Sorry, did I wake you?'
'Who is this?', I massaged my nose to sink in the sleepy effect.
'Hi, it's Opeyemi'
Again, she does not say her surname. All these artist's shaaaa.
'I have an exhibition near you and I have been painting all night'
'Really?'
'I need to talk to you'
'Now?'
'I don't want to carry this over to next year'
I laughed and throw my hands in the air, it's the first time she ever made me laugh. I always find her, too intense.
'I'm glad it's funny to you'
Now, I feel guilty.
'I'm not making light of your situation'
'I know, but you act like I'm so boring '
'Thats not true', I tried to sound serious.
'Thank you'
'For what?', now I'm confused.
'The selfie that snapped me out of limbo, with Daniel'
'I swear, I had no clue'
'I know, they looked happy. The kiss looked flawless, effortless. It even inspired my latest art work. It's called betrayal'
That was funny, but I could not laugh.
'Humor is how I get through heartbreak'
'We all go through it, somehow', i tried to calm her down.
'Will you come?'
Now, she was pushing it.
'I know where your loyalty lies, but please. Come, so I don't feel guilty because I was cheated on and then dumped'
Tragic and sad, was how she just described her life. I was curious to see how she Crafted it all into her work.
'You didn't do anything wrong, Daniel is one of those men, that marry when they are almost sixty'
'He's waiting for you'
'For where? He only shows interest because I am unavailable. When you have your family and your twins, we will all attend his wedding'
'Are you serious?'
'She will be in her late twenties'
Opeyemi was laughing so hard, I fell of the bed. I was laughing too and enjoying myself.
'Why didn't I relax and just enjoy our friendship?'
'When a relationship is wrong, it brings about depression and an almost, permanent bad mood'
'Are you talking from experience?'
'Opeyemi, I've dated the spawn of the devil himself. It was God Almighty that delivered me from him'
'I heard'
Not exactly the answer i was expecting, but I know how news of failed relationships spread. And as we grow older, we don't shy away from our mistakes. We are just thankful, we had the strength to escape the clutches of stagnation.
'I didn't mean to... Daniel told me'
'If he didn't, someone else would have. Don't worry, I'll be there and my crew too'
'And Nnoye?'
'She has her hands full '
I get, that Nnoye is very popular now. But, I do not want part of that fame. I want to be famous, for my hard work, for my designs and projects. And it's good to feature, once in awhile, in glamorous magazine's. But life, never changes. Sooner or later, the paparazzi always turns on you.
I love attention, but I also love my sanity.
So, today has the potential to be cool and calm or scandalous and chaotic.
Only God knows, which it's going to be..
**Season 1, Episode 95**
**"ADE'S JOURNAL", 95 COPYRIGHT 2016**
**BUSOLA ELEGBEDE, COPYRIGHT 2016**
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