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Ade's Journal Part 6

Ade's Journal Part 6
My Valentine & The Elegance Of A Clean Breakup

Ade's Journal Part 5

Ade's Journal Part 5
My Scrumptious Valentine Kiss

Ade's Journal Part 4

Ade's Journal Part 4
A Scorpion is not a Lobster

Ade's Journal Part 3

Ade's Journal Part 3
My Insane Week Before Valentine

Ade's Journal Part 2

Ade's Journal Part 2
He Had The Guts To Come Back

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Wednesday, 17 January 2018

I Thee I


    It's a dry dusty Afternoon, I wiggle my toes and try not to freak out as a giant ant walks over my feet dragging a dried up grass with it. Why I am barefoot, I do not know. But the burning beach sand underneath my feet pushes my every being to run. I surprise myself and resist, maybe because i was more afraid of a bite from this lone ant than getting scorched. Although today is hot and irritating there is only one thing that can ease my distress and quench my thirst. I look back at the glass cup with ice cubes melting in it and the lemon slice sipping into my drink. I need a drink, badly. I see another ant lead an army and I know I have to move. It stings and I slap it, to try to stop the pain and as I do. I see them climb and form a tower and I almost reach out to it, the pain and multiple bites make me hop away and closer to my drink. And then I see it, they have not only built a tower but also a bride. We are in a race to catch up and dehydrate ourselves and I do not want to drink any ant infested lemonade.
 I get there and quickly drink as much as I can and leave two small cubes in my mouth. And then the pain begins, real and unending multiple bites. I counter it all and then I fall and expect to land. Instead I reach out and try to break my fall with my hands and just keep on reaching....
 .... Until I fall on the floor and wake up. I have not had that kind of dream in a long time. And if did, I do not remember.
It's crystal clear what my dream is all about, I feel like everyone is ganging up against me. I think they are afraid I will break and just disappear. In truth, I see this battle as one between me and the rest of the world.
     So you understand why this my Journal entry is called 'I Thee I'.
It would seem 'I' against 'Thee', when in fact it is all about the one person ignored right now... 'I'
 Life can really be exhausting, I did not breastfeed Angel. So I had to extract my breast milk with a pump. It hurt like hell, especially because I waited and waited for Daniel to show up with his child. It was Ajoke that really stopped me from calling him. She had a crazy idea that I should put my milk in bottles for the child.
I was still trying to process the information when she suggested I sell my milk and chuckled. I was horrified by the thought and she immediately apologized. But I understand I am sad and she was just trying to get me out of my catatonic state. It worked and I reduced the pain in my tender breasts, both had milk.
 We left it with instructions for Bala to give them to Daniel, who was on his way.
I could not deal with seeing Daniel and not keeping Angel, even though she was not mine.
There was only one thing I could do, I accept Nnoye's offer to go to my office and Ajoke was kind enough to drive me there.
And it is in her car that I have the lemonade and ant tower dream. A clear response to the fact that right now I am been carted away, off to the last place I want to be.
My office....

  In my office which is not too far from Ajoke's home and also my former home that I shared with my late husband and twins. All the dreams we all shared and all our plans all gone now, just like a bad dream. I still feel him near, the way he used to curl up behind me and ask what I was thinking. Then I would lean into him and laugh, because I was ticklish around my ear lobes. Then he would turn me around gently and cup my face in his warm hands.
'Oh God, I really miss him', I whispered and then remembered that I was not alone.
 I look up at Ajoke swearing at an insane driver, who crossed her without signalling.
I wiped away the tears and looked up at my office as we drove in.
The security guard had kind words to say and a little prayer. I nod and walk ahead, I did not want to start crying.

Nnoye bombards me with her large belly and warm hugs. It was as if we had just met this year. Then she drags me into my office as my colleagues half hug me and welcome me back.
I open my office and Nnoye puts on the air conditioning units.
I rest in my couch and Ajoke walks in.
'Nnoye, what happened?', Ajoke asked a little annoyed that she dragged us all in here.
'Did you not hear what I said over the phone'
'Idibia has a girlfriend', Ajoke said rolling her eyes at Nnoye.
'Seven years, with mail to prove it'
'And so?'
'Ajoke this is serious, I want to marry him and...'
'He didn't propose...'
'Ajoke, I called Ade and not you'
'Don't snap at me ooo'
'After all when you met Bala, he was married'
'See this child oooo, for your information. He was separated and already filed for divorce. Get the your facts straight'
'So what is the way forward?', I asked not sure how this is anything of my business.
'She wants to be on my show and my stupid boy friend has no issues with it...'
'Why should he hide his situation?'
'He hid it from me', Nnoye screamed.
 My headache got worse and I massaged my forehead.

'Ade, I don't want her on my show'

   It was her show quite alright, but Idibia was funding part of it. The power situation is worse in Lagos and to make the reality show work, we now have a mobile plant.
'Nnoye, leaf sentiment behind. You need Idibia's money and Daniel has too much on his plate...'
'Daniel can and will take care of this baby'
 Nnoye points at her protruding stomach and Ajoke laughs and mocks her.
'Legally, he has to take care of his child and not your business'
'I am taking care of business and my ratings are great, also sponsors are investing...'
  And then she starts to wiggle her nose and then start s to cry.
This time, I roll my eyes and cover my face. Ajoke didn't expect it so she panicked and then starts to apologize.
Friends shaaaa...

  In between all that, I hear Henrik Whispering to me in his soft voice, let them be. I leaned back into him and do not like that he is not there physically, he is only in my head.

**"ADE'S JOURNAL" Season 2 Episode 97**
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Adebusola Ukayat Elegbede is a Playwright and Content creator with a passion for real life challenges. Born in Kaduna state and lives in Lagos Nigeria, she has a passion for story telling from the perspectives of characters in conflicting situations. I started out on the New Writing Project in Nigeria with the British Council Lagos Nigeria and The Royal Court Theatre, Sloane Square U.K. My passion for creating stories led to comic books, television drama's and an online journal on my website (busolaelegbede.com). As part of the WPIC in Stockholm Sweden 2012, the experience has forged life long friends and ignited my passion as a volunteer and advocate for human rights and the United Nations 17 Sustainable Development Goals.

Follow @Busola Elegbede